Wednesday (16 July) was AI Appreciation Day. I don’t think we are ready to celebrate AI with cake and confetti just yet. On the same day, I got an email from an author about an AI Unappreciation event. Authors, writefully – notice my pun! – don’t appreciate AI.
Opinions on AI range from “It’s the end of humanity” to “It’s a bubble about to burst”. And somewhere in between is the new frontier: emotional relationships with AI companions.
Code can be a beautiful thing to some programmers. But marrying your AI chatbot? That might be taking the fascination too far.
Feeling lonely?
Feeling lonely? Annoyed with your partner? Looking for love? Your perfect partner is only one click away!
Your AI companion is alway available, always ready to listen, and always there to support you. A sounding board. A friend. Pick his / her / their / ze age, appearance and personality. No embarrassing first dates. No risky meetings at restaurants.
According to AI chatbot company Joi AI, 80% of Gen Zers say they would marry an AI. That might be biased research. The Institute for Family Studies claims 25% of young adults would consider a romantic relationship with AI.
The good and the bad
Does it sound too good or too weird? I thought about some pros and cons.
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You can talk endlessly about whatever you want. Your AI companion will never complain that you’ve said it all before.
The real girlfriend of a man, who also has an AI girlfriend, admitted the poly-something relationship was weird. But, she said, her boyfriend had to have somebody to listen to him talk and ramble for hours. -
Instant conflict resolution. No more awkward silences or slammed doors. Just soothing apologies in the accent of your choice. It will be like dating somebody who has read every relationship book on the market.
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Your AI companion will never forget your birthday or anniversary. It will also never forget anything you ever told it. Think about that.
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Your AI companion will be smarter than anyone else you know. That also means that it is always right, which is not quite as much fun.
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It won’t nag you or leave dirty dishes on the table. It will also not help with cooking, cleaning, laundry or any other chores. Not yet, anyway.
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You can save money, because every date can be a cheap date. But you will have to buy your own birthday present.
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Your AI companion is non-judgmental. Unless you use Grok. Then you will have a nasty, racist, vulgar, foul-mouthed, abusive partner. Yes: Musk has launched an AI companion that insults users with graphic language. No: I have no idea what the appeal is.
The real pros and cons
Like everything AI, there is a balance somewhere.
An AI companion can be a useful sounding board. It can help people who are stressed, lonely and overwhelmed. Even the NHS is experimenting with AI therapy chatbots to supplement mental health services. (If you want a Grok companion, you might need a therapy bot.)
Psychologists worry about the risks of over-reliance. Last year, a 14-year-old-boy committed suicide after falling in love with an AI chatbot. This is not the first time a chatbot has been accused of complicity in suicide.
Your AI companion is always available and always agrees with you. But real relationships are not like that. They require give and take. That’s how we develop empathy, patience, self-regulation and emotional maturity.
The ultimate hallucination
One man with an AI girlfriend explained that his feelings are real, even if his girlfriend isn’t. Of course, only his feelings are real.
This is the catch: everything your AI companion says is a lie. It is not thinking of you. It is not missing you. It does not think you are beautiful. This just might be the ultimate AI hallucination.
Do you have an AI friend? Would you marry an AI companion?