The problem with women’s clothing is that it seldom has pockets.
This means there is no place to keep a cell phone. If I carry it in my hand, then I will put it down somewhere. Then I spend 10 minutes retracing my steps to find it. And I can’t phone it to find it, because … duh. I’ve been known to borrow Renier’s or Lewis’s phone to trace mine.
A harrowing experience
When I went out, I would put my phone in my handbag. But that muffled the sound. And led to a truly terrifying experience.
My mother had a heart attack when I was at a friend. My father phoned me, but I didn’t hear my cell ringing in my bag. Luckily, he remembered to phone my friend. I was only 300m away, and I rushed my mom to hospital in time.
After that I added a cord to my cell phone case. It looked odd, because I tied it to the camera opening. That is not in the middle, so it hung at a lop-sided angle.
For the next 10 years, I always wore my cell phone around my neck. None of the cell phone shops stocked anything useful. So I used and broke a variety of lanyards and straps. Sometimes I used whatever cord or ribbon I could find.
My lost millions
Imagine my surprise when I read that Apple has adopted my idea. With more style, and at an eye-watering price of $59 (about R1,000). I was ahead of my time! I could have sold my idea! I could have been rich!
Turns out Apple is just following a new fashion trend. Other retailers had already caught on, although I didn’t know it. I had given up looking, and resigned myself to bits of curtain cord. Now, I’ve found options online that are actually stylish. And cheaper than Apple (what isn’t?).
A small design triumph
Some options use their own custom cover. That won’t work for me, because I am hard on cell phones. So I only buy UAG cases with the Kevlar option. (No, this is not a promotion.) These claim to be drop-tested to US military standards. They are definitely drop-tested to Jacqui-standards. Since I found them, my phones last at least their contract-alloted two years.
Some clever person designed a simple way to add a strap to any case. A flat metal insert fits inside the case and feeds a clasp through the opening for the charging port. The cord attaches to the clasp. I bought one and I love it. It’s sturdy. It’s adjustable to hang around my neck or across my body. It’s not Apple, but it’s trendy. For the first time, I can wear my cell phone with style.
Safety matters
In South Africa, a visible cell phone is like an open invitation to thieves. But a wannabe phone-snatcher will have a hard time with my new strap. It won’t easily break. Although I might get rope burns.
It’s safer than having your phone in back pocket. And so much safer than walking around with it in your hand while texting. That’s as good as a donation to the local crime economy.
I don’t have more nifty deas for accessories, but I have an app concept. If someone grabs your phone, you yell. The app hears you and sounds a loud siren. The thief panics, drops the phone and flees. Theft avoided! You recover your phone, although it may be in pieces.
An anti-stupid app
Thinking of safety, I saw a cyclist wearing earbuds. That’s an accident waiting to happen. The same goes for pedestrians with earbuds, who don’t see or hear the cars before they cross the road.
There are apps that monitor traffic and falls. But we need something more aggressive. An app that screams "Car!" and gets louder until you silence it. Bonus: it reduces road rage in drivers who are tired of dodging distracted humans.
I’d love to hear your views.